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Kimra on stage
I've
always been a teensy little bit ham. When I was a kid, I'd host
elaborate neighborhood productions with my neighbor, Jamie Yoder, in his
basement. We'd set up lawn chairs and force our parents to pay a nickel
a piece to come down and watch us and our siblings croon original
numbers we had created which (surprise!) featured huge, lengthy solos by
yours truly. However, despite this craving for the spotlight, my family
and "real life" has kept me rather grounded and my feet
(somewhat) on the ground. So imagine my delight last week when we were
at MGM Studios on the Disney complex in Orlando and the host of Indiana
Jones show called for some volunteers. Immediately, without any
prompting from those who know and love me best, my arm shot up into the
air.
"Do we have any honeymooners?" The host requested. Darn.
Twenty-one years this June hardly qualified me for that, and even if I
had been on my honeymoon, nothing short of a stick of dynamite would
blast my husband onto that stage. I sadly lowered my arm, noticing
with disgust that the honeymooners chosen didn't seem AT ALL animated
when they spoke into the microphone and they carried out their acting
jobs with wooden monotoned, unenthused voices. Rats. "I could have
done better than that." I hissed to my husband. This was putting me
in a bad mood.
"Do we have anyone who is in a good mood?" The host requested,
squinting into the sea of five hundred audience members.
"Ooooh! Me!" I shouted, jumping wildly into the air, arms
flailing and legs strangely buoyant beyond imagination.
The host scanned the audience for a moment, and finally, "You. In
the pink shirt with the sunglasses on your head- jumping around."
I looked at my family for confirmation. I was wearing a pink shirt! I
had sunglasses on top of my head! And indeed, I was jumping around like
a madwoman. I had been chosen! ME! I felt like Miss America as I bolted
down to the stage, raising my arms in the "victory" pose. When
the host asked me my name, I was loud, precise, and as overly animated
as a cartoon character. Disney was going to want me after this! When she
asked me to laugh like a crazy person, I threw back my head and
screeched into the microphone a laugh SO INSANE that it still makes me
reel to think about it. A resounding laugh from the audience was my
reward, and so I was off to wardrobe.
While decking out in my authentic Disney garb, I was asked to sign a
release form which would absolve the giant Disney corporation of all
liability should I say, accidentally run through the sheets of fire
which would soon be lighting up the stage. I wrote my name and address
VERY CAREFULLY in case (in the likely event, actually) Disney
wanted to give me a call to beg me to join the cast of all their
productions permanently. Then I was off to the stage, this time in full
costume. While in the production, my part called for me to shop (I was
really good at this; having much personal experience), appear horrified,
(I used the Method acting, imagining walking into one of my son's
bedrooms and viewing the mess), and delighted. (This was easy- I WAS
delighted!) The fifteen minutes of pseudo fame passed in a quick blur,
and then I had to go take off my costume. The fitting gal gave me a
bottle of Disney water (free!), and told me that I did a good job. The
host, who had noted my overly enthused state, said, "You're a
natural- you seem very at home on the stage."
I didn't want to brag and bring up Jamie Yoder's basement; it just
didn't seem right in the the face of the honeymooners' obvious lack of
experience, so I just shrugged and said, "You know, I think I am
just a little bit of a ham." Sipping my Disney water, I made my way
back to my family who was wedging its way back to me from the sea of
people. No one seemed to notice me, sans costume, and I was not accosted
for autographs or bombarded with compliments. Still, the experience of
"starring" in The Indiana and the Temple of Doom production
had made my day; my week, maybe even my month. And don't forget that
waiver I had to sign. I had written VERY NEATLY indeed, and
I imagined it wouldn't be too long before those guys at Disney were
giving me a call.
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