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Not
one of them
It
is official: I have become someone I no longer recognize. It's a well
known fact that I spend a lot of time at the gym; I drop my youngest off
to school and am in attendance daily for a cycle class and most likely a
Pilates class as well. But, I was always quick to state that I was not
ONE OF THEM- the gym rats that actually LIKE the exercise, or who talk
about muscles and metabolisms on a continual basis.
I was just a former fatty, as I saw it, who likes, no, NEEDS to eat
whatever I want, and the gym was a means to that end. While I wasn't
looking, however, I gradually began to metamorphosize.
In my defense, I couldn't help it; the power is way too strong. There
are many of them (professional gym-goers) and just one of me! I mean,
what was I to do? I think I was able to keep up my "them against
me" mentality for as long as the exercise remained EXCEEDINGLY,
EXCEPTIONALLY hard.
Which was a very, very long time for a exercise novice like me. I didn't
help that I threw myself into the very activities which are considered
tough even for the elite physically fit types at the gym: cycling and
Pilates. I chose these two activities for various reasons- the
number one being that most of the people who did these exercises on a
regular basis looked phenomenal. I wanted to look phenomenal too; how
hard could it be?
Well, as it turned out; it could be very hard. It took me a good six
months before I actually even knew how to do either of these exercises
properly. Before that time, I was in the class, I THOUGHT I was kickin'
some major butt- but I was just a ridiculous parody of form and motion.
Time passed, and I became aware of all the mistakes I was making, and
one by one, I corrected them. As I did this, I grew stronger and more
able to compete with the other gym folks, who, as it turned out, were
just regular folks like me. These people were just chocked full of
helpful hints, I discovered as soon as I let my guard down, and best of
all, they were willing to SHARE!
Oh joyous days! Fab abs and tight thighs could only be days away, as I
figured it. I pumped up the exercise schedule and then one day realized
that I was not only exercising to eat- but that I was ENJOYING the
process!
But that wasn't when I realized I had totally gone 'round the bend. Oh
no, that wasn't when I thought I seriously needed some mental help
because obviously I was a changed person from the Kimra I had always
prided myself upon being. It was...... at the movies. My hubby and
I had gone, sans boys, to see some kind of adultish flick. You know, one
of those rated R movies with some good old cussin' and bodies flashing
that makes you glad you are over 17 and able to view such entertainment
right out in the open? After the movie was over, I got up to throw my
popcorn container into the trash and I felt a tug on my right thigh.
"Oh my gosh." I said to my hubby. "My quads are
sooooooooo tight tonight."
I know what you are thinking. I thought it immediately. "Eek."
I said to him. "I just said 'quads'."
My husband, who sometimes just doesn't get me, didn't understand the
significance. "So?" He said.
"I am one of those people who say stuff like "oh, my quads are
tight" and, "my triceps need a little extra work today".
I replied, horrified. I also realized that in preparation for an
upcoming trip to visit family, I had purchased CARROT STICKS and CELERY
as well as bottled water for the car ride. ME! Who used to consider
Mounds bars, Coca Cola and Pringles the staple to any trip over thirty
minutes long!!!!!
I don't even know who I am any more. It is rather disconcerting and
alarming to realize that I am one of those celery eating people. I don't
look any different on the outside, but even if I am not voicing it, I am
probably thinking about my aching hamstrings or my pulverized quads or
wondering if my hip flexors are going to cooperate in Pilates that day.
In short, I have totally become an alien; even to myself. I don't know
if I'll book a therapy session just yet, after all, it could be that one
day I will become used to this new me and just sit back on my achin'
glutes and realize that all of us change as we age and if celery and
tight quads are just a by product of that change, then call me a gym rat
and I'll try to deal.
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