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 Not Too Swift

The idea that a President, who dodged his military obligation by hiding out in Alabama nightclubs drinking and doing drugs, would have the audacity to challenge the military career of his opponent, shows just how deranged the incumbent President has become.  He is a danger to himself and others, and most of those others are We The People.

The so-called front group “Swift Boat Veterans for the Reelection of the Texas National Guard Slacker” have mounted an ad campaign to impugn the integrity of the one man running for President who actually knows first-hand what war is like. 

Okay, so John Kerry didn’t get blown apart like Max Cleland or Bob Kerrey, and he didn’t have to sit in the Hanoi Hilton for years like John McCain, but he actually went.  George “AWOL” Bush isn’t even fit to hold these guys’ coats, yet he has his stooges from the Texas Republican Mafia running TV ads, calling talk shows, doing cable TV talk shows and hawking a book claiming Senator Kerry is unfit for command.  Bush or his evil Svengali Big Dick Cheney know they can’t make these accusations themselves, since they have absolutely no credibility, so they have rounded up a group of fat-cats to do their dirty work for them.  The connections of these rich Republicans to the Bush family dynasty go back to even before Poppy’s run for the White House in 1988.  

The New York Times has reported: “Records show that the (Swift Boat) group received the bulk of its initial financing from two men with ties to the president and his family - one a longtime political associate of (political advisor) Karl Rove's, the other a trustee of the foundation for Mr. Bush's father's presidential library. A Texas publicist who once helped prepare Mr. Bush's father for his debate when he was running for vice president provided them with strategic advice. And the group's television commercial was produced by the same team that made the devastating ad mocking Michael S. Dukakis in an oversized tank helmet when he and Mr. Bush's father faced off in the 1988 presidential election.  The strategy the veterans devised would ultimately paint John Kerry the war hero as John Kerry the "baby killer" and the fabricator of the events that resulted in his war medals. But on close examination, the accounts of Swift Boat Veterans for Truth' prove to be riddled with inconsistencies. In many cases, material offered as proof by these veterans is undercut by official Navy records and the men's own statements.”

The Times and The Washington Post have each documented the words and actions of the men presently accusing Kerry, and have found that in years past they supported Senator Kerry whole-heartedly, both in praise for his war efforts and in personal appearances in support of his campaigns for the U S Senate in Massachusetts.  Some of these words of praise come from past elections and some come from as little as a few months to a year ago.  And yet now they seem to have changed their minds.  Are their words taken out of context?  Do they really believe what they now say, or is the financial fix in?   

Why would anybody believe these phonies?  Are the people in the two or three swing states where these ads are running really that naïve?  And what lunacy drives G W Bush and his advisors to think that this is not going to come back to bite them big-time?  It’s like the death wish of a serial killer leaving clues hoping to be caught.  Kerry went.  Bush didn’t.  Does Bush really want to have that discussion?  And why are we talking about THAT war anyway?  Is it because if we talk about the present one Bush REALLY loses?

These guys from Texas, the not-too-swift Navy guys, are really not so upset at what Kerry did or did not do during the war.  What they are truly upset about is that Kerry gained the spotlight as one of the leading spokesmen for Vietnam Veterans Against the War.  This is what really has them riled, and Karl Rove’s cronies have tapped into that nerve and bankrolled this whole operation trying to discredit Kerry and derail his campaign.  It won’t work.  The American people are not that stupid, are they?  GAWD, I hope not. 

New England politicians are much more mannerly and polite than their down-and-dirty cowboy counterparts from the Lone Star State.  Senator Kerry will have to get down in the mud and get his fingernails dirty if he wants to take these sleaze-balls on on their own terms.  It’s like the eloquence of Daniel Webster or the polite panache of Calvin Coolidge against the vulgarity of Lyndon Johnson or the mean-spiritedness of Phil Gramm.   

The President, who wanted at one time to be known as “the Peace President”, has involved us all against our will in what may become one of the great debacles of all ages, making such events as the Bay of Pigs seem like a Sunday picnic.  The Bushes are like WASP Corleones, attempting to settle old scores with expatriate Saudis, malcontent Iraqis, Iranians and Afghans, and anyone else with whom they disagree.

Hey- -nothing personal- -It’s only business.  That’s why John Kerry must be contained at any cost- -even if it takes bald-faced lying to keep him from saving our country from certain disaster.  And speaking of bald-faced lying, who better than Dick Cheney to fit THAT bill?  That’s why it takes tapping into old wounds to manipulate a bunch of sore losers into making unsubstantiated accusations that may hurt Senator Kerry. 

It’s as if Eddie Haskell is President.  “Yes, Mrs  Cleaver, those pearls make you look lovely this morning.  Do you always serve breakfast with a pearl necklace on?  And how is Theodore today?  Has he made up his detention since skipping school?  Oh, I guess I wasn’t supposed to tell you that.  He really is a swell boy.  My friend Clarence “Lumpy”

Rove and I will be happy to escort him to the library to help him with his homework.”

The Bush campaign theme song will soon be Great Green Gobs of Greasy Grimy Gopher Guts as we head to New York and the Convention Beyond Mention.  Meanwhile, these Navy vets, who don’t seem to realize they are being used as pawns, can mount the podium with Dubya, and help him explain his DWIs, and just maybe we’ll get to hear from his old coke dealer. 

Not too swift.

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